Anonymous asked: I want to fall in love with a guy like you

Well, if you’re really sure about that, all you’ve got to do with idiot-fools like me is this:

Wear dresses.  

Skip occasionally. Circle a lake in a four poster bed.

Dye your thoughts blue.

Read to us, we like that.

Hide in covers all day and climb trees at night.

Tell us why you’re reading that particular passage, what it made you feel when you first read it.

We especially like that.

How does it make you feel now,

now that you’ve read the grooves all out of that thing?

Never give it a girl’s name.

                How would you feel if I called yours Clive?

Never complain that we use your toothbrush

                it’s how we show we care.

Never throw imperial mints at strangers

                lest they be angels in disguise.  

Never use the term: It’s the time of the month

                         Instead, choose one from the list below:

                         The redcoats have landed, The Curse of the Irish,

                         Grandma’s Visiting, Falling from the Roof,

                         Nabokov’s tiny madman in his padded cell.

(besides, that’s what dark towels are for, come on girl, you know you love it)

Go to Tehran. Read aloud from Les Fleurs du mal.

Memorise a Shakespearian sonnet.

Corrupt honest men, tame all nature, make truant fundamental laws.

Kiss with your eyes closed.  

Be a jumper-wearing golden goddess with magic between your thighs.

But above all else

please-please-please

be kind-kind-kind,

and caustic cruel scathing cold

to those who can’t,

or simply won’t.